Saturday, April 26, 2008
im single. (again!)
lzk and me shall remain friends. i don't wish to say more, but i understand that he's going thru a tough period and he just needs space and time to advance his career. so i wish him all the best for his career. =)
chris, han, and all my other friends that have got so worried for me, im sorry. i know u guys love me alot and don't wish to see me upset or hurt. im blessed with friends like u guys, and i cant be more thankful. again, i'd say, leave zk alone. not that he complained, but i think i'd rather u guys not talk to him regarding issues about us anymore. afterall, we've ended, and all this "upset-ness" should end too.
rather than making zk feel guilty, and me feel upset, i shd just let go alr. perhaps the r/s has run its course. perhaps there is still a future out there for zk and me years later. perhaps there is someone out there that's more suited for him. perhaps, perhaps. my wish for my bday is simple. whatever happens, i just want him to be happy. that's all.
many are worried, and irritated with me for not being able to let things go. i can only say that i love him alot, and it'll take time for things to settle down. i'll give myself ample time to recuperate, so my darling frens, pls dont rush me. at least now im happy staying friends with zk. im happy with things the way they are now. and i understand that some things cant be forced. i cant predict the future, and he cant give me promises. so lets just stay friends and see what He has in store for us.
thanks zk. for talking to me and for giving me a closure to this. u must do well k! then it'd be worth it for me to leave!! i still wanna irritate u, have dinner with u, and probably bitch to u about all the little things. keep a lookout for someone better too! =)
thanks all my darlings. for all the worry and stress i've put u guys thru. for all the company and all the talks. i owe u guys a whole damn lot. i know im useless when it comes to relationships. so thank you for being so patient with me. i love u guys. really really do. im very touched by all that u guys have done, so, thank you. i dont know how else to express my gratitude alr.
ok. now, who has a cute, charming, rich, loving, humorous guy to intro me???
*[a lil princess thought at]*|03:07|
Sunday, April 20, 2008
all's well again. =)
i dont wanna talk about unhappy stuffs again. i just want to look forward to a happier day everyday. i want to see him in my future, i do. i know many have discouraged me from taking this route. maybe u guys think i have too much faith in him. but i do, mysteriously. i just have a feeling that he's still essentially the same person i love despite all that has happened the past few days. im staying on with faith and hope. that's all i can hold on to, till i feel the love from him again.
sorry for worrying everyone. i'll learn to love myself more too.
*[a lil princess thought at]*|23:37|
Saturday, April 19, 2008
i've tried, but there is just that much i can do alone. he doesnt with to see me or speak to me. i feel abandoned. that's the only word i can find to describe how i feel. suddenly i realize how worthless i am to him, how little he values this relationship. no matter how i try, his mind and heart has no place for me anymore.
i know friends are concerned about me, but dont sms or call him. he doesnt wanna talk about it. that's all. so there is really no point yea? thanks though. i know u all really care.
feel so useless not being able to control my emotions in front of his mom. she was my first listener after all this happened. im not ready to talk to any of my frens. i needn't care about his mom's impression of him, obviously she knows him better. but i dont want my frens to pass judgments about him. talked to aunty for way longer than i thought i would. it was heartaching to see her tear cos of us. i felt bad for all that has happened. she dotes on me, and i'd definitely miss her. circumstances might have brought zk and me apart, but i think its somewhat fate that brought me to know aunty. a very different mum from mine and my friends'. really thank her for that long chat. it allowed me to find that little bit of peace within, smth i lost. i'll try to study hard aunty, i'll try not to think. i will really try.
i think i need sleep, food and a little more joy in my life to keep me sane.
this is the first time in my life i regret something. i regret loving someone who gave me up so easily.
i received my first 21st bday gift!! a breakup from limzhikai.
*[a lil princess thought at]*|00:38|
Thursday, April 17, 2008
there are just that many things a person can take.
maybe i am paranoid. maybe i am unreasonable. maybe u lie too much. maybe u are unreasonable. maybe we could have worked out together. maybe. maybe. maybe.
doesnt matter who's to blame, cos its ended anyway.
had to talk to myself (literally) to tell myself not to cry. and i didn't! well done.
for some reason i recalled the breakup with sy, and this is just so similar. haa.
needed people to talk to earlier. now i feel like i need to hear ppl talk.
i got a birthday curse that noone can break. NO ONE! serious. this is at least the 5th year im having a bad birthday.
*[a lil princess thought at]*|21:57|
Saturday, April 12, 2008
i really dunno which pic is clearer, so i put up all 3. the middle one is my current design on my nails. =) oh and pardon the lousy resolution. it was taken from my webcam of the new lappie. its...... 1.2 megapix? haa. but i like the nails. hope u guys like it too! as for now, im willing to do 3d nailart for anyone on their own nails. as for acrylic nails, gimme more time to perfect it. =) yes it'll be chargeable, other than those few friends i promised to do free trials. heh.
*[a lil princess thought at]*|00:14|
Saturday, April 05, 2008
im mad, and i have a bunch of lunatics as my group members this sem.
Sherry: the beauty, the try-to-be-sane, the ppt guru.
Shirley: the blur, the not-funny-joker, the innocently-accidentally-meet-S eyes, the classic smile.
Meowzhi: the bitch-er, half of the "we-are-so-smart" duo (the other half is me.), the write-results-till-we-drop partner.
Uncle Chris: the MAN, the hip-hopper, the monotone-voice-monster, the tries-to-stay-sane leader!!
hahahahahaa. my group is insanely hilarious. just the other day, we were thinking of reasons to give cos we wanted to push back presentation dry run date by a day. (remember that we got a member of the group that's constantly sick..) so we all found ourselves illnesses to diagnose ourselvses with.
Sherry: I got stomach flu!
Shirley: Ohh I know, I got dehydration.
Mad: I got gastric problem.
Meowzhi: I got.. (honestly i forgot what she had...)
Uncle Chris: I got eyebags!!! (pathetic face)
wahahhahah.. we totally influenced uncle chris can! wtf, EYEBAGS! then he called nina. and see this convo that nina role-played out in class to explain how monotone and dead uncle chris' voice sounds.
Nina: Hi Chris!
Chris: Hello.
Nina: Yes, whassup?
Chris: Could we push back our presentation date to Friday?
Nina: Okay.
Chris: Okay? (The first time Nina heard life injected into his voice.)
Nina: Yea, ok! So are you guys going to come for class on Thurs still?
Chris: (turning to the 4 crazy girls at the table.) Nina asks if we're still going for class tmr.
(Background: Yes! yes! YES! yes!)
Chris: You heard that right?
Nina: Yes, ok see you guys in class.
by the end of the convo nina was laughing so hard cos she couldnt picture how we worked tgt. uncle chris was soooooooooo dead in his voice, and the 4 perky crazy girls are just noisy and high pitched and all. i guess that's how we drove him mad. hahahahaha.
*[a lil princess thought at]*|15:59|
